This is a transcript of a conversation between Phoenix and Aria (pictured above, as a child). If you would prefer to listen to the original audio-recording on which this transcript is based, you can download a zip file containing the original MP3 audio recording by clicking here. The transcript below is substantially edited for legibility, and to add new information.
PHOENIX: How can teachers spot abuse?
ARIA: Children who are extremely-quiet are the most worrisome. This is because after the disruptive-phase comes the silent. Once a child has fallen profoundly silent, things may be so traumatic at home that the child no longer even tries to resist; or to fight back; or say anything. The child has learned that any effort to resist just invites more pain from the abusers. The child reverts to near-silence in a last-ditch effort to avoid attacks.
Effectively, the child enters a completely-hopeless despair. That point is so dangerous because the child really feels they are at life's end at that point. The child can see no hope; can see no way forward. If you see a child in that state, this is a major indicator of serious abuse.
Obviously the challenge is to interpret the child's behaviour as a meaningful-expression of distress. Too often, the child is attacked privately at home, and then attacked, later, in public for expressing their justified-anger. Often the child will 'act out' the private abuse they are experiencing, later, in public. Watch the child's public behaviour carefully. Is the child trying to non-verbally express what is being done to them in private?
Society relies on the myth of the 'tantrum' or other smears that children are subjected to. If children's emotions were taken seriously, society would have to confront the reality of the child-abuse epidemic.
In essence, society has decided to label as 'shy' those victims-of-trauma who were so scared of social situations that they dare not speak; or who feel uncomfortable, awkward, and reluctant to be present.
I believe that the word 'shy' a massive whitewash. These so-called 'shy' people have been very hurt. I speak as someone who used to have that symptom. I did have what many people labelled as a shyness. But, it was not shyness, whatever this word actually means; a sort of vague intangible originless fear of social situations.
I didn't want to be in public spaces, and around people, because I was scared of people. I think this is what shyness often is. It is fear of people. But, society does not want to ask: Why is this child scared of people?
As humans, we operate under something called behavioral-conditioning, whereby a stimulus-response system operates. Once we have a negative experience in connection with a certain stimulus. For example, we're raped by an adult, then around other adults we will be reluctant and scared and confused and distant.
To call this behaviour shyness is an affront to humanity. It's an act of violence even to call someone 'shy' when they have been hurt, and consequently reacts to society with extreme caution. There's such a lack of vision; such a lack of understanding in the use of this word.
ARIA: Yeah, I feel very strongly about that. I have this problem a lot of the time because I still feel very scared around adults; around a lot of people; around most people.
If you look at animals, I don't think I've ever seen a shy animal. Maybe, they're shy around humans. On the whole, you don't see a shy cat, really, or a dog, unless it's been traumatized; unless something's happened to it.
If you are a survior of boarding school, you can read Phoenix's complete testimony regarding what boarding schools do to children by clicking here. Reading Phoenix's account may help you to piece together your own experiences, or provide support to friends or family who were subjected to this abuse.
Many people have been encouraged not to speak out. So many of them blocked that experience out because of fear. There was a small-resurgence and interest in boarding school on account of the Harry Potter movies because the Harry Potter movies depict boarding-school as an absurdly idealistic, magical-place, where children go to learn about the mysteries of life, and the natural world, and ways in which they can cast spells.
However, the reality of boarding school for me and for many children that I've spoken to, and many survivors of boarding school is that it's a deep, and dark, and terrifying place, very akin to a prison. In these schools, children who have been neglected and abandoned by their parents are then invited to raise themselves, and to inflict anger and pain on each other because of that abandonment.
Boarding school is another very disturbing, ugly, British construct. It's not surprising to me that Britain has fostered the most-malicious modern society. The Monarchy has repeatedly pillaged and exploited other countries. The British Establisment has repeatedly invaded other countries without any self-reflection.
It doesn't surprise me that these people hang a flag, the Union Jack; the British flag. This flag is, to me, a swastika. It is even worse than a swastika because a swastika is recognized as a symbol of evil and malevolence whereas the British flag has gone largely-unremarked as a symbol of pervasive evil.
Now, having left the UK, and having looked back very carefully at my childhood; having looked very carefully back at the crimes of the British Empire, I now recognize that the Union Jack is a swastika.
There is no difference: The only difference between a Union Jack and a swastika is that most Germans have the good sense and awareness not to fly the swastika.
However, the British have continued to fly their swastika, and they hang it proudly above their houses. There is one flying above Buckingham Palace, where a woman in a gold-hat sits and collects millions-and-millions of pounds across the world from those whom she gives nothing to.
ARIA: I think the United Kingdom is one of the worst examples in Europe, possibly the world; based on our experiences. But I know of the experiences of other friends; other European friends, who also went to elite schools in France, or other European countries. It's awful all across the European continent. In my opinion, these friends in Europe also experienced terrible abuse. You can tell from their symptoms.
I think the abuse of humanity is a general problem connected to power and governments. But, I think the UK is a particularly terrible place. Mainly because it still has that monarchic structure. The UK still has this incredible divide between the rich and the poor, and is one of the worst places for inequality that you can find.